How I Will Be Spending Part of My Birthday

[Friend-of-a-friend invite sent via email...pumped beyond pumped.]
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All my single ladies!

It's almost February--and that means that Valentine's Day is right around the corner. To celebrate the love for ourselves and drinking, I will hosting the 2nd annual Valentine's Day Death Party! (Pre-game)

For those of you who were not in the small group of 7 that attended last year's bash, this party is a chance to get together with girls from all walks of rejection to commiserate on the year of failed relationships and ass hole men. Drinks will be had and Beyonce will be played, followed by the dance floor of a yet-to-be-determined bar.

For those of you in relationships--you're welcome to come and help the single ladies celebrate our fierceness and pretend you are single for the night. Just no calling, texting, special appearances, or mentions of the significant other (or any acknowledgment that you are in a happy loving relationship). Please be sensitive to our needs in these trying times, and fully commit to the theme of the party. Which brings me to my next point..

ATTIRE FOR THIS EVENT IS ALL BLACK.
(This is not a joke)

Also, you are welcome to invite any girlfriends you might have, even if I don't know them. No boys unless they are gay. Please debrief them on the important details.

If you can't make it don't worry--a party of 2 or 3 will make it that much more depressing and hilarious! But if you can, here is the info:

What: Valentine's Day Death Party
When: Saturday, February 12 at 9:00pm (to be followed by a night out)
Where: My house
Required Attire: All Black
Required Attitude: Beyonce in the Irreplaceable video, or any video from the BDay Album

Also, I will get enough liquor for everyone--but if you know me you know that I will buy the cheapest vodka available--so if you would like something classier you should prob bring your own!

XskullandcrossbonesX
Rachel (I'm clearly being productive at work)

p.s. for those of you who think I stole this idea from the movie Valentine's Day--please note that last year's inaugural party was already planned before the movie came out! haha
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Perfect Timing

Spritzed my last spritz of Coco Mad yesterday.

Coincidence or aligning of the stars?

(And I finished Invisible Man. 2 weeks ago.)

The grass, it was a'ticking
The sun was on the rise
I never felt so wicked
As when I willed our love to die

I was your silver lining, as the story goes
I was your sliver lining, but now I'm 

gold.

reading through this scene of love and fear.

My love is like a blanket--

it gets a little bit too warm sometimes.
I wanna wrap somebody in it
who can hold me in his arms.

Cause when it got a little too hot in there
He was always stepping out for air and he froze.

Oh he froze.

Only My Mother...

...would send this email...at 3:30am.

Hannah,

I'm stalking you on your blog... and playing editor... misspelled word... you used the wrong stair/stare. Fix that thing ... and I do miss your old background. Miss you too!!!

XOXOXO
Mom
 
 
Bahaa. Love it.

How Does Your Garden Grow?

Today I spent 3 hours in the Sears Auto Shop getting a new battery put in my car. 3 hours. For one battery. I think even I could have changed it in that amount of time.

I'm currently planning a trip to the Caribbean to see my dearly beloved KFelts... and I cannot wait. I will gladly, any day, trade gloomy January clouds for 85-degree perfection. In the meantime, I will continue to sit here, thinking of spring and all the delicious greens that are just around the corner...



Look--there's a Gisele growing in my dresser! Bahaa.

Love.

Take me here, please. Inspiration for my future tree-lined driveway...

Sigh.

What Kind of Map? Seriously. I'm On It.

.

Here's the Thing

My old awesome background disappeared into the blogosphere.
And now I'm stuck finding one that works/doesn't make me want to rip my eyeballs out.

Patience, grasshoppers.

Shit Is Getting Real

Mostly just peeved I can't be glutenous and drink 916ml of

Soy Toffee Nut Misto.

I have an iron stomach.

America...fuck yeah.

Golden Blows

Yes.

Yes.

Yes.

No.

NoooOOOOOoooo!

Umm... my life goal personified.

More to come later. 

Golden Slumbers + More

All this gloomy blah blah weather has got me in my usual January funk...I'm craving warm, delicious colors and bright yellows...golden hues and hints of glittery goodness. I guess the good thing is I'm not in the beloved (but frigid) Blacksburg, where I truly would be freezing my arse off.

This weekend I have the following (potential) plans:

- Go to Eastern Market and snoop around their thrifty/flea things

- Pop my RCC cherry and take a dip at the indoor pool

- Sand  my little pink table that I picked up at the Y last year and paint it some sort of tealy, greenish, seafomy color.

Sounds good to me! In the meantime, I will continue to stare at these cozy photos...summoning the sun one blog post at a time.

An upholstered desk chair = butt heaven.

This bed is so super cute I can't stand it. It started out an old blah boring white, and now look how fab it is! Perfect for lounging on weekends and snuggling with a cat. Or three cats. Meow.

My favorite part about this room is that it's teeny tiny but still fabulous. Literally a bed room. Holla to the matching bedside tables and sweet-as-punch polka dot headboard.

This house reminds me of a luxe country cottage/mansion somewhere where I should probs be living. Wallpaper, armoire, Burberry-eque jacket, green ploppy chair, hardwoods--done and done.

Introducing the most terrifyingly awesome wine cellar that ever existed!!! It's like walking into wine hell/heaven! Mega creepy, but pretty much to die for.

And finally....ready for Spring already. So. Ready. 

Freezing,

Hannah

Methinks This Would Be Nice...

Don't you?

Eating Up Boredom On An Island of Cement

Maybe that it would do me good 
If I believed there were a god 
Out in the starry firmament. 
As it is it's just a lie 
And I'm here eating up the boredom 
On an island of cement. 
Give me your ecstasy--I'll feel it. 
Open window and I'll steal it 
Baby like it's heaven sent. 

This ain't no love that's guiding me. 

Some days I'm bursting at the seams 
With all my half-remembered dreams 
And then it shoots me down again. 
I feel the dampness as it creeps. 
I hear you coughing in your sleep 
Beneath a broken window pane. 
Tomorrow girl I'll buy you chips, 
A lollipop to stain your lips, 
And it'll all be right as rain.

This ain't no love that's guiding me.
 
On winter trees the fruit of rain 
Is hanging trembling in the branches 
Like a thousand diamond buds 
And waiting there in every pause 
That old familiar fear that claws you. 
Tells you nothing ain't no good 
Then pulling back you see it all 
Down here so laughable and small 
Hardly a quiver in the dirt.

Today I'm Feeling...

Moody.

Anxious.

Melancholy. 

Lemme Upgrade Ya

Sooo, this weekend my mama came up to the hell-hole of NOVA to get her thrift on at The Big Flea in Chantilly. She came up Saturday night in a blaze of glory and we immediately drove to Ikea to drool and dream and splurge until our hearts were content.

I got an ironing board. And a lamp. And two new pillowcases for my bed. And a coffee jar. Holla. Moms got a trashcan, bathroom floor rug, and some wine glasses.

We are beyond easily amused.

Yesterday we spent the entire day being flea bags. We started out the day by me thinking I'd forgotten our $2-off tickets at home, only to discover that they were sitting in my car...the entire day. FML. Whatever, I made it though with some saweet new Pyrex mixing bowls to add to my new collection (thanks to Mama Parrish and her Christmas contribution).

*These are not my bowls, per say. See below, STAT!*

Tragedy Alert: I am missing one of the bowls! I've hunted on eBay, but I'm not good at that shit, plus I'm cheap, so if any of you fools stumble upon a turquoise Pyrex mixing bowl (I think it's the 1.5 qt one), throw me a bone and pick it up!

I also got a baby pipe tobacco tin that I'm using to store my chapstick:

"Edgeworth Extra High-Grade Sliced Pipe Tobacco"

Larus & Bro. Co. Richmond, VA U.S.A

"To the consumers of high-grade tobaccos...we desire to call your special attention to EDGEWORTH TOBACCO. It is the best combination that can be made, only finest selections of leaf being used. Every box of it is guaranteed not to burn the tongue and to give satisfaction. We will cheerfully refund money to any dissatisfied customers."

Also, picked up a badass bent fork key chain holder thingy to rock my work ID, solidifying my role as coolest coworker in the land. Duh.

Then we saw the usual junk that we figured we could craft and upgrade by about 3,000% on the cool-o-meter:

Mom bought some (unintentional) potentially racially offensive artwork that she thought was cool and historic or something. You can't hold her back.  

Then, we drove home, gorged on Potbellies, watched the Beyonce DVD because I just can't get enough, and crashed. Sads to see her leave, but twas a good weekend fo sho.

Get yo-self a case of the Mondays!

Whilst in Noho...

...I took like, three iPhone photos.

...and they were focused around beer and death. Enjoy!

We visited ole Emily D. at her grave site. It was cold and snowy. There's a little metal box next to her grave where you can write "Letters to Emily." It was empty. Overall, an appropriately depressing grave site.

However, a few feet away lay Leland...and his awesome Budweiser 40. Party on, Leland. Party on.

And finally, Exhibit A: Best Discovery Ever:

*Exhibit A: Best Discovery Ever

PBR LIGHT! It's true. And we're into it.

Noho love,
Hann

So Sue Me.

Look. I haven't been in a blogging mood. I have been doing shit. I have a life to live.

But srsly, I will get on that soon.

In the meantime:

You're welcome.