Beautiful Things That Are Making Me Happy.

Hottest mom ever?

Come swing with me, the best is yet to be...

Wysteria Heaven.

Sippin' tea on the porch sounds delightful to meee.

(Also: Good Brick)

Dreaming very big.

Roar.

Eff Yuppie Dads

Hellllllooooooooooo----- So, I didn't have to come into work until 12:00 because I worked overtime earlier in the week blahblah so this morning I went to the mall to see if they were still having a sale at Bath and Body Works where I could get lotion for $3 (they weren't so I was pissed...but that's another story).

Anyway, so as I'm walking through Macys, an insanely dressed MATCHING couple with two MATCHING kids--I'm talking jumped out of a Ralph Lauren catalog/wearing mega plaid--were walking in front of me.

The mom was holding the little boy's hand, Dad pushing the stroller. As we passed a stand of handbags the little boy stops and says,"Oooh look Mom--I like the red ones! I would love to have a red purse so that I can grow up to be a big, strong boy!" (No lie--his actual words. It was presh).

Anyway, the mom is basking in the glow of her son's adorableness and says something like, "Well of course you could carry the red purse, it's beautiful!" when yuppie Dad swoops in to ruin the day/instill some serious gender roles by saying, "Now [insert WASPy boy name], I've never seen any big, strong boys carrying purses before! I don't think you really want one. Maybe you'd want a football" (again, EXACT WORDS! I was following a little closely by this point). And the boy looks up at his dad like his little heart was broken into a million pieces and Mom shoots Dad the Death Look, and I'm still walking behind them, jaw-dropped in amazement.

<--Death look approximation.

Plus, I had to hold myself back from inserting my obnoxious two cents, but whatevs. Anyway, I thought you would appreciate that little tidbit.

Eff yuppie dads.-->

I'll buy that kid the fucking red purse with my own money--that I earned and keep in my equally awesome bag!!!!!

Ok. I'm at work now. We have mandatory happy hour from 4:30-6:00. That's what I'm talking about.

Tiny House vs. Teeny Tiny House. Round 1.

For Christmas this year, I was a very good girl and Santa and/or my crafty BF gave me the best gift a girl could wish for: a miniature replica of the Tiny House! I like to think of it as the Teeny Tiny House, as it is adorable and beyond what I expected when Cody broke the news that my present this year involved plywood, paint, and something called a jigsaw (flashes of Saw, anyone?). Oh dear.

Here are the results:

Reference: The Actual Tiny House. Ahh, love...

The Teeny Tiny House!!

*Note: John Lennon stands on the front porch compliments of the lovely Rebecca Derring and her wacky job at Kidrobot.*

Look! The roof opens to the inside where the walls are painted the same color as the actual Tiny House! He's good.

A new-age Strawberry Fields, perhaps?

Aww, shucks.

More detail/blabber to follow, but for now--off to bed and Harrisonburg for the weekend! Au revoir! xxx

I Went to College and All I Got Were These Lousy Acronyms.

A typical day in my new life as Hannah: Professional Editor/Hole-Punch Extraordinaire has become painfully predictable and ultimately dominated by...acronyms. Yes, that's right--acronyms.

Gone are the days of naughty fiction, sweet poems, and delicious memoirs. Now, everything I read ends up looking a little something like this:

"PMS would like to ensure that the FRP CO IPM reads well with COR's INGR in accordance with SP4080. In addition, we will accomplish RFP in the EQS using WMS system infrastructure. The BDO requires GFE and DTWC support to comply with DILA PQ."

How thrilling! What is that?! It rivals a Speak and Spell. To find definitions for these illusive abrevs, I'm supposed to refer to the ever-handy PMS Style Guide (yawn) or www.acronymfinder.com, which provides some hilarious alternatives to some very serious terms.

For example, today I was looking up the definition for NSOF. Naturally, I assumed the correct spell out is NOAA Satellite Operation Facility; however, I was very, very tempted to insert the more descriptive, colorful definition (in this case, NSOF = Not So Old Fart). Now that's a proposal I'd kick up my heels to read.

So, in honor of thee acronym, I have a Top 10 List.

Follow closely.

10. BARF: Best Available Retrofit Facility or Books Are Really Fun

9. MEB: Management Examination Board or Maximum Expected Burp

8. HTML: Hypertext Markup Language or How To Make Love

7. SWAK: Shallow Water Active Kit or Sealed With A Kiss

6. JPS: Joint Processing System or Just Plain Stupid

5. MSM: Marine Safety Manual or Men who have Sex with Men

4. VD: Voluntary Departure or Venereal Disease (see Figure above)

3. GMWAS: Guaranteed Minimum Withdrawal Benefit or Gag Me With A Spoon

2. SN: Secretary of the Navy or Saucy Nipples

and, my favorite,

1. POAS: Psychological Operations Automated System or Poop On A Stick.

C'est la vie. FML.

A Life of Lists

If you didn't already know, I enjoy a good list. Always have, always will. Lists make me feel alive. They make me feel organized. They make me feel like I'm actually accomplishing something throughout the day. God, I'm awesome.

So, I realize it's inevitable that I will have multiple (if not daily) lists on this thing. See below.

Books To Read Next:

• The Feminine Mystique, by Betty Friedan (started yesterday!)
• My French Life, by Vicki Archer
• Ava's Man, by Rick Braggs (started it, loved it, obviously began second book and forgot to finish. Dangit)

Hobbies to Attempt Whilst Rotting in NOVA:

• Take more pictures/find a photography class.
• Join a running club and actually remember what it's like to be in shape
• Learn how to make soap. And how to sell it on Etsy. For lots of $$$. ORGANIC! NATURAL! suckers.

More to come, duh.

Buzz Ballads and Orc 2...A Good Drive to Work.

This weekend, I acquired almost 500 new songs from Clarrisa's eclectic (and substantial) iTunes Library. I got everything from Amy Winehouse to Edith Piaf to the Warcraft II soundtrack--serious quality tracks. So, on my drive to work today, I decided to flip on the ole iPod and see where shuffle took me....

I started out with some Joni Mitchell (niiice), continued on with Nick Drake (I hate when I first hear songs in commercials, but I think it's also in Garden State, so whatevs...), and finally pulled into work jamming to Orc Victory, which, if you haven't had the chance to listen to while fly through a parking garage, I highly recommend.

If you're disappointed with this selection, no worries...I threw in a little Brick (still one of the saddest songs in the world--hello Hannah's life circa middle school), some epic Buzz Ballads...plus, I get to leave at 2:00!!! A good day, indeed.

Things I'm Into

Ok. So, here are my favorite things that I've seen today (online, at least). Check it:

Keel's Simple Diary. Tis the shit.

Somebody's Baller Living Room

LOVE LETTERS

Counting down the days till my girl-date with Del to see this.

Also, saw some awesome photos from Jessica Claire...love love love the wedding photos.

Songs I'm into today:

• You Made a Fool of Me--Me'Shell NdegoOcello (Seriously, with a name like that, who are you to make a fool or her?? Idiot.)
• River--Jonie Mitchell
• Chasing Pavements--Adele

That's all for now.

Well hello there....

Today being Monday and the start to a new work week, the end to a month-long tryste with my lover, and the third week into a New Year, I thought what the hell? Start a blog? Everyone's doing it! So here I am.

I'm not sure what I'm looking for in having one, other than something to keep me occupied, imaginative, fruitful, or otherwise interesting during my time at work and in the dreaded Northern Virginia. Maybe it'll make me write more. Maybe it'll convince me to explore. Maybe no one will see me and it'll be my own little retreat into the cyberworld. Whatever.

Here I go...

...geronimo!